Once again, Dean’s OT cancelled one of her sessions with him. I keep saying that I’m going to do something about it and I don’t. Dean really likes her a lot. I’m going to just pull her aside and ask her if she can really handle him in his schedule. He needs consistency. Maybe, she just needs to hear it from me. I’m hoping I can get a second OT person for when she can’t make and keep appointments. I hate that he’s missing out so much on much needed sessions.
1/2/18 – Speech
Dean’s sleep has gone back to normal. Dean was seen at home during part of his HMEA session. He is starting to understand that he works to complete a task and then break. He works well for 1st hour. Dean made nice eye contact, more sounds during play, turned pages and watched signs for animals and more. Dean is getting a cold again and was tired by end of session.
- Continue to name animals and animal sounds while looking at animal books.
1/2/18 – OT
Dean had ABA this am 8-9:30. He gets ABA services Tues – Friday 8-9:30. Lisa (Speech) comes on Mondays. Dean did well today despite having a busy morning of ABA 8-9:30 and speech 9-10. He is more socially connected when I came in, he gave great eye contact and ran right over today. He did well transitioning to working chair. He was able to consistently exert enough force to pull apart pop beads 5/5 times. He also enjoyed swinging and bouncing today.
- Continue to intersperse sensory play with movement, bean bucket, etc with time to work chair
- Continue to try to have him point to objects
I am happy to report that we have flipped through the book a few times, but no animal noises since my throat was scratchy from a cold. I have him chose and point to what he wants. I let him run around and free play before doing 5 to 10 minute activities in his work chair 2x a day.
With Love,
Home Sweet Phoenix Cove 
Glad to hear your son is reaching some small milestones. Even if they are small for him I am sure it’s great! You should be pleased, I hope he continues to thrive and that the therapy continues to help him! I think it is also a good sign he is responding well to the sessions and the therapists. Sometimes it is hard to find what works for your son, and sometimes parents are iffy about starting ABA, as they want to protect their child and unfortunately there are some bad ABA treatments out there and sometimes autistic people themselves make an ignorant assumption about ABA that can give parents the wrong idea. So I think it’s great it’s working for your son, I am sure he will continue to do well and improve! Every achievement big or small is good to celebrate. 🙂
I remember as a child, the whole eye contact thing was very challenging for me. Even now when I have my bad days I can’t do eye contact, it makes me more anxious, tired and nervous etc. It’s weird that eye contact comes naturally for some people, for myself I had to teach myself to do it and it still feels awkward to stare into someone’s eye balls. So instead I have taught myself certain tricks to do it or get around it yet still looks like I am making eye contact.
I don’t even like the whole eye contact thing myself. It makes me uncomfortable and in other countries it is actually considered rude to use direct eye contact. It just makes it hard to get him to watch to use signs to communicate. I actually got back his ABA evaluation and they say he is at the stage of a 10 month old to 13 month old so like a year behind. He made a ton of progress today though. He stacked his ring toy all by himself! He was so proud and he got McDonald’s soft serve ice cream. Today has been one of the happiest of days and I’m glad that I can share it with you. He’s currently crying in his bed right now because he doesn’t want to go to sleep but I know he’s tired. I check on him every 10 minutes to let him know it’s okay to sleep. He’s having off and on sleep regression issues.
Yes direct eye contact is very uncomfortable. Glad we can relate in that aspect. 🙂 I didn’t know it was rude in other countries to give direct eye contact, maybe I should move to one of those countries. I’d fit in better. Haha jk.
Sorry to hear he is having a hard time to watch and use signs to communicate. Maybe if he keeps trying and practicing it will come with time. It’s frustrating to hear your boy is a year behind kids his own age, but he is still young and maybe he will reach his milestones in his own time and when he is ready. Society bases us on age it’s so funny, like the only thing we have in common as humans is our age, and it’s so not true. Yet they make us go through grades in school by age. Like age levels our intelligence etc and that is the only thing we should base it on. I don’t think it;s true at all and everyone is so unique. So I do hope in time your son can over come tough and uncomfortable challenges. Maybe he just needs more time. I do have hope for your boy. I was delayed by children my own age, and in some things it took me a lot longer to progress in or over come, but even I did it. I am now a 30 year old adult who can somewhat function in society. Haha. Nah, I do just fine I just say somewhat because a lot of the reason why I function the way I do is of years of practicing and mimicking neurotypicals. I am what they want me to be, even if it is hard sometimes or I see no point in it. I do it for them, not for myself. I think sometimes that is why I am so sensitive when it comes to autism. It is like imagine making a normal person and force them to live in a world where everyone is autistic and autism is considered the norm. And see how well you would cope. I get up and put on a show. When people tell me I don’t look like I have autism, I take offense but thank them for complimenting me on my acting skills because it is acting. I fake it everyday, with little breaks of course I have to give myself. I am rarely my true self. And I fake it till I make it, or sometimes it does lead to break downs, shut downs etc. Which is why it is important for myself to find a balance between me time and how much time i spend in public or dealing with people. I need breaks, they are very important. I have found a comfortable balance though I think where I am myself to an extent and I let most people see apart of me, but I do mimic and fake when it is comfortable me to do so. If I can’t and it causes too much trouble, I just be myself in an aspect or at times, and if I come across the wrong way I try to apologize or hope they don;t find me too socially awkward, or worse sometimes even rude without meaning to. Lol.
I am so glad he stacked his ring toy all by himself and it made him feel like he accomplished something. That’s important and great for his confidence. I am glad that today has been one of your happiest days. Sorry to hear about your son is off and on with sleep regression issues, I hope it changes soon for the better. But in that aspect don’t feel alone. That is not just an autism thing I don’t think. A lot of children don’t like going to bed even if they are told, and a lot of kids can fight sleep. Then there are also parents who deal with transitioning children to sleep by themselves and weeks have to put up with the crying with checking in and so on. I think it is a children and sleep thing. I was told I was quite the opposite, I loved my sleep, I slept through the night, in my own crib, to my own toddler bed and so on. My brother got up constantly in the night and would drive my parents nuts at least when he was a baby. He was always hungry. In his toddler years though he would be so busy, that they couldn;t get him to stay awake until bedtime. He would fall asleep often in his high chair at dinner time, literally in his food dish sometimes before finishing and before bathing. Lol. But yes I was always complimented by my parents on my sleeping skills. 😛
He used to be such a great sleeper. I guess, I was just spoiled that way. lol. I think I’m getting better at accepting that things will take longer from him and to celebrate all the little things with him. He is continuing to do the stacker by himself. It is a skill that he has acquired and I couldn’t be prouder.
You know, I hear that ALL THE TIME. “Your son doesn’t look autistic.” To which I reply. “Yeah, what does autism look like?” They always apologize after. I get what you mean now, because I think they think that autism and maybe down syndrome as the same thing? I mean, autistic kids look just like anyone else. It’s a brain thing.
They say that autism is an “epidemic”. Like it’s some kind of disease! Makes me so mad. Maybe, autistic thinking is human evolution. Maybe we are supposed to raise above the stupid stuff and bet smarter.
Oh, that’s another thing. Are you really smart? I heard that intelligence is very high in autistic people. Also, do you like the word autism in front of the word people/child/etc or do you like the phrase person with autism better? Or does it really matter?
Thank you for chatting with me. You make me feel like I’m not alone. No one I know really knows anything about it and my brother doesn’t want to be autistic anymore. He claims he isn’t anymore and just gets really mad. I don’t talk with him much anymore.
I have just about given up on replying to people who tell me I don’t look autistic. Autistic is a complex and very broad spectrum, there is no ‘one look.’ It makes me want to reply with “Well you don’t look ignorant either” or “You don’t look normal” lol. Another one that really bothers me si when parents tell me I don’t look or act like their autistic child so I can’t have autism. I am like I am an adult who have lived with this all my life, I have found coping mechanisms and worked on how to adapt or blend into society my whole life. Your child has not, the two are not the same. And the same as we said already, autism is not one thing or has a specific look.
Yes I know what you mean by it gets treated like some disease, like the worse thing that can happen to your child. Anti-vaccinaters are the worse too. Like even though the theory of vaccines cause autism has been debunked, that right now from my research I think genetics are the biggest cause of autism. Even if the theory was ever true it was said the combination of vaccines were wrong. That we could be more careful and spread out vaccines in children more, not just for risks of autism, but of other things too. No matter what it si you should always be careful with vaccines I think. I am not against them, but be careful spread them out ask what is the right combination in how to do it etc. I am like since vaccines do NOT cause autism and even if they did (for the sake of the argument let’s say it does) would you rather your kid have autism or get some deathly disease like the measles that vaccines prevent? Since vaccines do NOT cause autism, your child could still get autism especially if the family carries the genetic gene or whatever and thye may not even know it since back then so little was known about autism. Now your child is autistic and is prone to possibly getting some of the worse diseases in the world, some that lead to death. Yay for people 😛 The thing that pisses me off the most is not the belief itself, that I just don’t think not vaccinating your kids at all is smart. There are ways to be more cautious, and they are finding more out about vaccines and what is right.
Am I really smart? In certain things yes, especially my special interests. I have never had my IQ tested, but at times I feel highly intelligent. Just the way I think of things or see things. But autism creates a huge cloud in my mind too which I can get confused and it becomes like overwhelming. It is really hard to explain. I have a theory that I think is only my theory. And that is….I am not sure if people on the spectrum can be born with higher intelligence, if naturally having a high IQ exists for anyone. I am sure it does in some cases something I should look into more. Or….That because people on the spectrum also have extreme interests and obsessions. When we have a special interest we want to know everything about it, the work ethic with it will be very extreme etc, that it causes us to become really intelligent in our said special interest and maybe that is where the theory comes from. Albert Einstein was smart in what he discovered and what he did. But was that because that was his special interest? Same with others who are said to probably have been on the autistic spectrum, likely Asperger Syndrome.
I personally often refer to myself as an Autistic person because I feel my brain is autistic. I don’t know where myself and autism meets. It feels my brain is autistic. So therefor that’s me. I was born with a different wired brain. Just like any humans have different aspects about themselves that makes them unique or themselves, but they are still over all ‘neurotypical” it is not abad thing. But I don’t find either description “A person with autism” or “autistic person” to be degrading or insulting. I feel the autism community has far more worries on our hands with how not to support us or include us than fighting over tiny antics like that. I also think it depends on the person in wish they want themselves labeled as. I have been told by autistic people and people off the spectrum the fact I use the word ‘Aspie’ can be insulting and to that I say it is my words, my diagnoses, my journey I can use words to describe MYSELF and it shouldn’t be offensive. People can talk about themselves or their diagnoses’ however they please, it can be offensive when you are labeling other people sure. But your words for yourself is just your own journey etc.
No need to thank me, I have equally enjoyed our chats. I am glad I can help you feel not alone, it means a lot. I am sorry to hear your brother is negative towards autism. I dont think I will ever not be autistic as it is basically my brain’s make up. I can just do things when I see fit and feel comfortable that makes me blend in more and make me not seem as autistic. That doesnt take away the autism though. Example sensory overload….I hate loud noises, but I don’t freak out like a crazy person when I am exposed to it anymore be it in public or wherever. But on the inside I am losing my mind LIKE OMG MAKE IT STOP IT SOUNDS LIKE A ICE PICK IS JABBING THROUGH MY EARS URG. 😛 But I don’t say it outloud. It isnt going away, the world still drives me nuts sometimes I just find more polite ways to respond so I can be helped, coping mechanisms etc or I dont say anything and freak out on the inside by myself. lol
LOL. I think it is normal to freak out inside. Like a coworker was having a personal call not during her lunch talking about mattresses. MATTRESSES! For 20 minutes. I wanted to kill her. lol.
That’s good to know about the labeling. I wasn’t sure and someone had mentioned it to me in passing.
It really is a journey for both of us and I am glad to have others like you on the ride with me. Makes me feel good and know that he has a future ahead of him. Sometimes, I get that dark cloud of despair that he’ll never grow up, get a job, get married, have children. It’s good to know that someone else who didn’t talk is now successful and married and thinking about children. 🙂 I hope he finds acceptance in our world.
Good to know you understand it is normal to freak out on the inside. I think because of my anxiety and autism it can be a lot worse though sometimes, and causes me to like meltdown. Lol. I had a harder time as a teen or child too controlling my emotions, but learned coping mechanisms or ways to deal with it as I got older. I think we all learn the older we get. Lol
Yeah when it comes to labeling and the spectrum I think it just depends on the person, group etc. I also think people have their own ways of describing or talking about their own diagnoses.
Yes it is a journey for both you and your son. I am glad I can bring some comfort and happy to have met you as well. Like I said there are different levels of success too, but there is hope he will find success and acceptance. A big importance is for him to find happiness and help him with his strengths, encourage him etc. There are people on the low end/severe end of the spectrum, and will be dependent on care all of their life. There is nothing wrong with that imo, they just need people in their lives to accept them for who they are, and as long as they are happy. I hope he finds acceptance in our world too. He is growing up in a good time that way where we are becoming more educated about Autism and more aware, and with awareness comes acceptance. More support and help comes with it as well. More programs, resources how to accommodate those on the spectrum and so on.
Thanks for the kind words. With people like us, the world would be a better place for all.
Hopefully this lady starts showing up more! It seems like it would be against policy to cancel this many times though, and I imagine the same thing would have happened with other parents she worked with?
She did three sessions this week, so maybe she turned over a new leaf. She is also making a sensory swing for him to help calm him. I think she’s making up and trying to save her job. It’s working as long as she comes through with the swing. Those things go for $500 and she’s making ours and charging it as working supplies.
it will be great if that works out! maybe she just had a rough time with the holidays or something.